Notes on the Atrocities
Like a 100-watt radio station, broadcasting to the dozens...

Friday, March 05, 2004  


WASHINGTON (API)--API has recently obtained several documents apparently stolen by Republican staffers from Senate Democrats. The contents of the documents related primarily to election-year strategies. One such file apparently came from Senator John Kerry, and appears to be notes about candidates for running mate. The notes stretch back for more than a year and run through early this week, suggesting that Republicans continue to pilfer Democratic files. The Kerry document is reprinted here in its entirety.


February 24, 2003
Advisors suggest team begin consideration of running mate. Field incredibly weak; Lieberman poses only threat. Potential Clark candidacy may cause trouble. Consider Clark and Lieberman as running mates.

March 2, 2003
War looming; a few nuts in Portland and San Francisco protesting. Must compete with a war president. Contact DLC to find pro-war moderate with foreign policy experience. Lieberman leading polls. This is the years for an insider with experience.

March 16, 2003
Advisors focus-grouped a running mate. Southern moderate/conservative polling well. Need to offset the Massachusetts liberal thing. DLC recommends Zell Miller; innoculation against liberal elitism. Perfect candidate: Kentucky, moderate, a general.

April 25, 2003
War has given a big bump to the president, but the protests have been fierce. Advisors recommend moving away from pro-war candidate. A focus group in Des Moines liked a moderate gay from Indianapolis--pulls away the social moderates from Bush. Must offset war popularity somehow. Advisors looking for a moderate gay. Joe Biden?

May 14, 2003
Who the hell is Howard Dean? What's a blog? Advisors now suggest a moderate Southerner who's anti-war. Could be gay. Could be a general.

July 28, 2003
Running mate must be anti-war. Advisors suggesting a populist, might not be a moderate. Focus groups in Maine, Kansas, and Florida all like Howard Dean. Everyone likes Howard Dean. Either get Howard Dean or become Howard Dean. Forget the general unless he's anti-war. Running mate must be an outsider, but with experience. Clark.

August 12, 2003
Dean on cover of Time. Must run from the outside, the Democratic wing of Dems. Liberal is in. DLC still suggesting Zell Miller. What about Joe Trippi? Focus groups don't know what they want. Bush is targeting Hispanics. Bill Richardson?

October 28, 2003
Moving operations to Iowa. Advisors suggest an Iowan running mate. Could be gay; must be a populist--moderate or liberal. Advisors suggest naming him now. Must get Iowa. Private note: meeting with mortgage broker at 2 on refinance. Somebody give Tom Harkin a call.

January 3, 2004
Advisors suggest gay liberal techie. Fired advisors. Hired new advisors. They advise a union man--an anti-war manufacturer. Could be southern. What about someone like Bill Ford Jr.?

January 21, 2004
New thinking: outsider not important, experience not important (Edwards). Focus groups "Schwarzeneggering." They say go celeb. Perfect candidate: Charles Barkley--black, southern, popular with NASCAR set. Leery about Schwarzeneggering strategy.

January 28, 2004
Lieberman out. (Someone send him a card.)

February 5, 2004
Gays out.

March 3, 2004
Schwarzeneggering strategy gaining currency. "Elvis." Suggestions: 50 Cent, Eminem. Edwards all right in a pinch.

posted by Jeff | 12:01 PM |
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